I Forgot How to Wander
For most of my life, I’ve been on a schedule.
At first, it was basketball.
Long before I became a Financial Advisor, I was a student-athlete. If practice started at 4:00 p.m., you showed up at 3:45pm. If you were late, everyone paid for it.
“Get on the line.” Ask any of my teammates, the worst four words a basketball player could hear.
My time wasn’t my own.
In college, I wanted to be the best. Most days were spent balancing classes, studying, workouts, practices, film sessions, team bonding, and finding every possible way to improve. There wasn’t much room for wandering. When I wandered…let’s just say it wasn’t great.
Then came my career.
For nearly 22 years, I lived by my calendar. “No White Space.” I learned and trained this concept to my team for years.
Every hour had a purpose. Every meeting had an objective. Every conversation moved something forward. My assistants managed my schedule, and more often than not, I simply went where they told me to be. There was very little white space.
And honestly, I appreciated it. Every day felt like the mental Olympics. I was competing for my clients, with my peers, and often with myself. I needed to optimize my day, and optimization became second nature.
Success reinforced it.
Then I stepped away.
Thirty days. Six countries. Countless unforgettable experiences.
I thought Europe would teach me about different cultures. Instead, it taught me something about myself.
More than once, my fiancée Rachel gently reminded me to stop checking the itinerary.
“Just be present. You have no meetings tomorrow.”
It sounds simple. It wasn’t.
I realized I wasn’t looking at the schedule because I needed to know where we were going. I was looking because that’s how I’d been wired for decades. If I wasn’t planning the next thing, I wasn’t sure what to do. I even found myself meeting strangers during our trip and starting to talk business and plan for them…(LOL).
But there wasn’t another meeting. There wasn’t another client call. There wasn’t another deadline.
There was only the moment I was standing in and the rest that my mind needed.
Some of my favorite memories weren’t the ones we had planned. They were the unexpected conversations over dinner. The strangers we met and now have become friends with.
We stopped to the side of the road and walked through vineyards without checking the time and rushing off to the next destination.
I actually stood in front of paintings at Art Basel long enough to notice something new each time I walked by. I even had time to go back and admire the art several times.
I was in no rush to finish any of my meals. We closed down several restaurants. We were the last ones there multiple times.
I sat by lakes and rivers with nowhere else I needed to be. (It was terrifying.)
I booked last minute tickets to the World Cup, without planning!!
For the first time in a very long time, I wandered.
When was the last time you wandered?
Not because you were lost. Not because you had nowhere to go. But because there wasn’t anywhere you needed to be.
We often celebrate productivity, efficiency, and optimization.
Trust me, they’re important. They’ve served me well. I literally trained and planned peoples lives for a living. No room to wander when it comes to planning someone else’s life and managing their life savings.
But this trip reminded me that my presence in the moment has value.
Curiosity has value. Rest has value. Time with my family and friends has value.
It reinforced for me that, at least for now, I didn’t have to live by my calendar. And that maybe for a little bit, some of life’s greatest returns weren’t going to be found on a financial statement.
Thirty days in Europe didn’t teach me how to retire.
They reminded me how to be present and to rest.
And maybe that’s exactly what I needed.
Life. Wealth. Purpose.™
